Sunday, February 3, 2013

well-meaning friends

How many times do I need to say, "I don't want more stuff" before my friend believes me?

I learned fairly quickly to not shop with this same friend since a quick errand always turns into an all-day trip followed by several trips into the house with all the unneeded stuff she couldn't pass up, but how do I convince her to not buy things for me when she's out shopping without me? I washed my throw rugs and she insisted they be hung to dry rather than being tossed in the dryer and being winter, I borrowed one of hers (from the "rug" cabinet - I didn't know people had rug cabinets!) for a day... it doesn't mean I need (or want) her to buy me rugs... especially not clearance holiday rugs. *sigh* I've said no nicely many, many times... and yet, it still keeps happening. I've tried the tactic of saying I just don't have space to store extras (I don't!). She's big on couponing and is always looking for the great deal and cannot understand why I'm not thrilled over her loads of excess toiletries and food she'll never use.
I've also been getting a lot of flack from my friends about the hours I've been working. I've noticed they're much better at spending than making money, but they'd be amazed if they knew how much I've paid on my rv the last couple months! How much?
Next payment due:   02/10/2015
Yeah, my next rv payment isn't due for two full years. LOL Of course, I'll keep making payments, but I loved seeing that. =)

I've discovered another advantage to living in a small space this week. I know almost instantly when one of the critters has an issue. Thursday morning, Phoebe was visiting the kitty box far too often. An overnight stay at the vet's (to get a sample) resulted in a UTI diagnosis and a very grumpy kitty twice a day when I have to medicate her. She looks sweet, right?
Yeah, just try and get liquid meds in that cute little face! No fun for either of us. =( She does seem to be feeling better already though! Too bad she needs to be on meds for two full weeks... We're also trying out a new set of meds on my kitty, Xander, for his chronic respiratory issues.

Nothing to show going out since nothing has come in other than a skein of yarn I won from a podcast. It'll be a wash (one in, one out) if I ever finish the shawl I started on New Year's Day...


  1. Perhaps doing the "wash" with the gifts your friend gives you would be a way of proving that "no means no"? The thought is there, but it's not a gift if it's unwanted and unusable for you. My mum will send things that I neither want nor like, so they end up at the thrift store. I say 'thank you,' and that's the end of it. The guilt of keeping it around "just in case" is long gone.

    Sorry to hear Phoebe isn't well! UTIs are nasty. I feel for you having to give her medicine. Even the sweetest, most loving kitty will bring out the sabres when it's time for medicine. She's lovely, btw. My sweet Dinah was a calico, too.

    And congrats on the RV paydown! Fantastic!! :)

    1. Thanks! I'm loving see the balance shrink... still a long way to go, but I'm making progress and saving quite a bit on interest!

      Phoebe does seem to be feeling better already and thankfully, her dose this morning was pretty easy. Hoping that keeps up the next two weeks! =)

  2. Telling folks you want (& need) less stuff is right up there with telling your drinking, smoking & high-carb eating buddies that you are quitting drinking, quitting smoking & going on a diet. Their initial reaction is always to say something like oh good for you! But really what they mean is but you're messing up the status quo harmony that is our current way of being & in a roundabout way, you are pointing out their own shortcomings, weaknesses & excesses.

    It's like pointing out the fact that there's a giant pink elephant in the room when everyone else was pretending it wasn't really there.

    Eventually though the drinking, smoking & high-carb buddies try recruiting you back into the circle by needling you with questions like: So are you finally done with that whole not drinking (or smoking or diet) thing yet?? or Just have one beer, it won't kill you! or You should buy that sweater - it looks great on you & since you're buying that sweater I better buy that shirt/jeans/bracelet/jacket because it's on sale n stuff!
    Your friend may be both trying to drag you back into the world of excess by slowly loading you up with excesses. It's her version of saying have another beer Karen, it won't kill you.

    1. lol I think you're right. People are seeing my choice as a judgement on their choices. I just have no desire anymore to buy unnecessary crap. I think my friend has started going through her clothes and packing some up to go to a resale shop, but she's still bringing in loads of stuff... just not clothes. She's big on buying gifts for potential recipients who she might need something for at some point in the future. I know she already has a stash of these items, but she can't pass a clearance rack. =(

  3. That's too bad your friend doesn't "get it". Good luck with that. As for kitty's UTI, my little furry gentleman had that issue along with some crystals and we had to switch to the vet catfood for the rest of his life. His diagnosis came with a lot of pain and an expensive night at the vet's. He lived another 19 years to be a respectable 22 years old though!

    1. What amazes me is that she still doesn't think she has "enough" though they could not shop for years and not be wanting for anything other than fresh produce and perishables.

      Phoebe will be 10 in about a week and has been a very healthy kitty... thank goodness esp since she's so much fun to dose. lol

  4. Sorry about the kitty UTI. I have dealt with that several times between our current and previous kitties. Thankfully our vet offers an antibiotic shot now instead of the liquid meds. It costs more but I'd pay $100 (it's not that much) to avoid the scratches and the pink med going everywhere, not to mention a seriously furious cat. lol

    1. Phoebe and I have come to a sort of understanding. lol It's not easy, but it's not as bad as it was and she doesn't hold a grudge so as soon as she's loose she's back to her purry self. I'll keep that in mind however!! =)


please be kind =)